Pardon the lack of posting. I have been wanting to write for eons now, but I wasn't able to blab about the primary issue in my world right now until some legal issues had been hashed out. Life gives us hills and valleys to traverse, and mine has been in a valley for quite awhile now. I found it difficult to focus on anything, let alone speak to frugality. I was just trying to keep my head above water.
I wrote a bit ago about being back in debt (credit and car) after escaping a couple of years ago. Health issues were the primary cause for both, as the only quality care I could get required out of pocket spending, and transportation issues required that my ample ass purchase a car. Not exactly fun stuff. In the course of the past three months, I have had another health setback, filed for divorce and buried my father. Good times, y'all. Good times.
The divorce has been largely amicable, as much as these things can be. It's taken an ugly turn here or there, but I'm doing my best to embrace the suck and soldier through it. Lord knows I am much happier now that I am no longer in a miserable situation. I should note for all you glorious newlyweds out there--my marriage was ultimately about a green card and being able to continue to date, as my boyfriend-then-husband is from the UK. There was no grand proposal or tales of life long commitment at the time. But still, it's seven years of my life (3.5 hitched) that is now done. It's difficult. The stress of it doesn't help my health woes (which are ultimately going to be fine, praise the all the fishies in the sea), and having my father's unexpected death didn't make the process of loss and grief any easier. It's been a rough road. But, as one of my favorite sayings goes, "Shit could be worse." Can I get a witness?
Feeling wounded, I stopped focusing on self-care in virtually every arena. I just checked out. I would say I've largely been checked out for a couple of years now. I would advise y'all against that kind of coping mechanism. I have learned through this ordeal that the most critical thing we need to do in times of crisis is to stay awake at the wheel. If we don't, shit just gets worse. Work piled up, I missed crucial deadlines, health issues flared up, on and on. Thankfully, I have an extremely understanding boss (who has been just amazeballs), and a gaggle of friends who continually blow my mind with their rockstar support. I've slowly been waking up, putting my hands at ten and two, and taking control of things again.
One of the areas that I'm wrangling is, of course, my budget. My expenses have increased, and I no longer have someone paying half of the bills. Not the best combo. Thankfully, I have some kick ass skills over the years that I've gained in living a consciously frugal life, and they are coming in mighty handy right now. I'll be boring the five of you left here with those tales over the next few months.
I know we all must go through the loss of our parents, but damn, it's not easy. Like most everyone else, I had a complicated relationship with my father. But I loved him, and was loved by him, with a fierceness that kept me grounded. I believe firmly that time is not linear, and we can choose the moments in which we life. I choose to live in the moments where my father was at his best. These are the three best bits of wisdom my father gave me, and I've done my best to set my compass to these shining stars:
Don't take any shit.
You need a man like you need a hole in the head.
(In response to a weight loss infomercial) Don't ever hate yourself to make some asshole rich.
Here's to the upswing and better days, y'all.
Monday, May 20, 2013
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Celebrating my 40th Do-Gooder Style
Some of you have already received this in an email or via farcebooks. Forgive the excessive harassment. But, yanno, this is me we're talking about.
I turn 40 this month. FORTY! Instead of
weeping or conjuring a Pollyanna façade about the joys of aging, I decided to
do something useful. This year, I won’t demand that you visit and drink
excessively or even buy me a new pony. This year, I want to help a stellar
organization that I do a bit of volunteering for, and I’m asking you (politely,natch) to help me in that effort.
The Brothers in Arms Foundation is a volunteer-lead
non-profit organization that was started by a super awesome retired Marine, Phil
Noblin, to support a wounded brother, Eden Pearl. Eden has been a dedicated US
Marine since 1993. On August 16, 2009, Eden’s vehicle was struck by an IED. His injuries caused burns on 90% of his body
and a traumatic brain injury. Due to the severity of his injuries, both of his
legs and one of his arms were amputated.
Eden currently continues his recovery process with the help of his wife
and daughter.
In an effort to normalize their life while Eden recovers,
the Brothers in Arms Foundation has made a commitment to build the Pearl family a custom home in San Antonio, TX. This
customized home will allow Eden access to the military burn center and VA
polytrauma unit, one of the best treatment centers in the US.
To celebrate my 40th, I am asking you to help build Eden’s home and provide support for medical expenses not immediately covered
(we know how stellar insurance companies and the government are at caring for
wounded veterans, amiright?).
I have a modest fundraising goal that I would like to blow out of the water. I know times are tough, taxes are due, and somebody is always
in need. Such is the nature of life and
community. No donation is too small (or too large!). Anything you can give will
be appreciated by me, the Pearl family and the Brothers in Arms Foundation
team.
Thank you for tolerating me these 40 years, for supporting
our wounded warriors, and generally being an outstanding human being. Let’s
hope the next 40 years brings us all abundant health, good belly laughs, and a
world where our warriors don’t have to face such struggles. Thanks for helping
me celebrate. AMERICA!
(All the links are to my fundraising page. You can also access it here:
Thanks, y'all!
Friday, March 8, 2013
Shunning Standard Financial Advice
My last post bitched about the joys of being back in credit card and car debt. So much fun! Really. Just like having a rousing case of hemorrhoids. And what girl doesn't love a good 'roid fest?
Many moons ago, I used to coach folks about getting out of debt. I supported all the standard notions: cut everything non-essential out; budget like a frugal ninja; tell friends and family to learn to like hugs over gifts, etc. We've all been there, done that, right? It works. It's fabulous. Which is why I'm not following the standard advice this time around.
Wait, that didn't sound right. But yeah, I'm changing the game a bit, simply because I'm old and tired. If I were going over my budget and gave the standard advice, I would tell myself to cut out charitable giving, sending stuff to military folks via Adopt a Platoon, and eliminate eating out. No new clothes. No trips. Cut, cut, cut until that debt beast is dead and preferably as quickly as possible.
After having a health scare, I'm a bit more selfish these days. The things that bring me the most joy in my life revolve around sending my soldiers random crap, being generous to charitable causes, and hanging out with my friends, which often involves meals out. I'm not going to cut those things out in service to debt. However, I am going to be smarter about it all. This means I will take close to two years to get out from under instead of one and will pay a bit more in interest. So be it.
So, here's how I'm doing the "wrong" thing a bit smarter:
1. I stopped using coupons eons ago, because I rarely, if ever, buy heavily processed packaged foods and my toiletry consumption is minimal (not to mention the fact that I often use products that simply don't offer coupons). But I have to buy that crap for my soldiers, because real food would mold prior to getting there, and I'm not sure some dude out in the desert is going to appreciate my homemade oil facial cleanser. So, a couponing I will go! I also signed up for a Target debit card, so that I'll get 5% off every time I shop there, which is where I get most of my soldier stuff. (Note: debit, not credit. Comes straight out of my bank account. I am trying not to wig about privacy issues.)
2. I cut back on some of my charitable giving, but not all. I'm still supporting the African Well Fund and the Worldwide Fistula Fund and random one-off gifts. Previously, I did not consider my volunteer work through Adopt a Platoon as a "charitable" act, because service members aren't "charity cases." They're trained professionals doing rough jobs in rough places. But now that Mama has debt? Yeah. Consider yourself a charity, boys! So, I'm still at the same percentage of giving, just packaged differently. The world continues to spin, oblivious.
3. I'm cutting back on eating out by mastering some recipes and having friends over for dinner. By "mastering recipes" I mean screwing things up beyond repair and forcing people to eat it anyway, lest we waste precious grub.
4. Since I've changed the way I live, my body is changing as well, which requires new and/or altered clothes. (Isn't it super great how 99.9% of all weight loss comes from the boobs and won't budge from anywhere else? Yay! My tatas are now sad remnants of their former glory. Thanks, nature. Thanks a lot.) A friend graciously gave me her sewing machine, which I am learning to use so that I can alter what I currently own, thus lessening the need to buy new goodies. My ultimate goal is to learn how to make dresses for myself. Feel free to swing by with a hands-on demo. I took a class once. I was the "special needs" student who sucked horribly at it. This will not deter me, however, because I excel and being a shitty, shitty beginner.
Next up? Ways in which I am following the old school advice. But I'm curious, is there anything that you do that's against the standard advice?
Many moons ago, I used to coach folks about getting out of debt. I supported all the standard notions: cut everything non-essential out; budget like a frugal ninja; tell friends and family to learn to like hugs over gifts, etc. We've all been there, done that, right? It works. It's fabulous. Which is why I'm not following the standard advice this time around.
Wait, that didn't sound right. But yeah, I'm changing the game a bit, simply because I'm old and tired. If I were going over my budget and gave the standard advice, I would tell myself to cut out charitable giving, sending stuff to military folks via Adopt a Platoon, and eliminate eating out. No new clothes. No trips. Cut, cut, cut until that debt beast is dead and preferably as quickly as possible.
After having a health scare, I'm a bit more selfish these days. The things that bring me the most joy in my life revolve around sending my soldiers random crap, being generous to charitable causes, and hanging out with my friends, which often involves meals out. I'm not going to cut those things out in service to debt. However, I am going to be smarter about it all. This means I will take close to two years to get out from under instead of one and will pay a bit more in interest. So be it.
So, here's how I'm doing the "wrong" thing a bit smarter:
1. I stopped using coupons eons ago, because I rarely, if ever, buy heavily processed packaged foods and my toiletry consumption is minimal (not to mention the fact that I often use products that simply don't offer coupons). But I have to buy that crap for my soldiers, because real food would mold prior to getting there, and I'm not sure some dude out in the desert is going to appreciate my homemade oil facial cleanser. So, a couponing I will go! I also signed up for a Target debit card, so that I'll get 5% off every time I shop there, which is where I get most of my soldier stuff. (Note: debit, not credit. Comes straight out of my bank account. I am trying not to wig about privacy issues.)
2. I cut back on some of my charitable giving, but not all. I'm still supporting the African Well Fund and the Worldwide Fistula Fund and random one-off gifts. Previously, I did not consider my volunteer work through Adopt a Platoon as a "charitable" act, because service members aren't "charity cases." They're trained professionals doing rough jobs in rough places. But now that Mama has debt? Yeah. Consider yourself a charity, boys! So, I'm still at the same percentage of giving, just packaged differently. The world continues to spin, oblivious.
3. I'm cutting back on eating out by mastering some recipes and having friends over for dinner. By "mastering recipes" I mean screwing things up beyond repair and forcing people to eat it anyway, lest we waste precious grub.
4. Since I've changed the way I live, my body is changing as well, which requires new and/or altered clothes. (Isn't it super great how 99.9% of all weight loss comes from the boobs and won't budge from anywhere else? Yay! My tatas are now sad remnants of their former glory. Thanks, nature. Thanks a lot.) A friend graciously gave me her sewing machine, which I am learning to use so that I can alter what I currently own, thus lessening the need to buy new goodies. My ultimate goal is to learn how to make dresses for myself. Feel free to swing by with a hands-on demo. I took a class once. I was the "special needs" student who sucked horribly at it. This will not deter me, however, because I excel and being a shitty, shitty beginner.
Next up? Ways in which I am following the old school advice. But I'm curious, is there anything that you do that's against the standard advice?
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
And We're Back! With Debt. Shit.
Anyone still out there? Man, how did all these cobwebs get in this place? Sheesh. Lemme clean this place up a bit and see if we can't sit down and have some tea. Wow. You look great. What's been going on in your world to give you such a glow?
Where to begin? Lord Jesus. For those kind souls who have been reading this awhile, pardon the repeating info here. I began this blog eons ago in an attempt to share a tips on living frugally in a socially conscious manner and to keep myself on the path of a consciously frugal life. Talking about this crap helps me to stay immersed in it, lest I fall into the American Consumer sink hole of idiocy. Like most folks, I wander the path quite well most of the time and occasionally wander off course here and there, usually course correcting before anything catastrophic happens. Usually. I also deftly avoided monetizing and/or promoting the crap out of this thing. I don't want it to be commodified (is that a word?). I have other avenues to generate money. I have loved--absolutely loved--the process by which readership and community has grown. I've made friends from this sucker. Dammit, internet and blogging, I love you.
Over the past couple of years, I managed to get out of credit card debt (hollah!), kill my car and spend more than a year as a car-free person in Los Angeles (seriously dudes? Shit ain't easy), buy a new-to-me car, and get knocked down by some serious health issues. Thankfully, I am back on my feet post health drama, although it's still a work in progress and probably always will be. But around this time last year, I couldn't walk and couldn't work. Praise the Baby Jesus and all the fishies in the sea, I am now working away and working out regularly. Back on my feet in a most literal sense.
When I got out of debt and lived my car-free life, I thought I was set. Finally! All those years of learning the frugal trade and living the frugal life paid off! I could afford to do absolutely scandalous things like hire cleaning help, buy art, and drink excessively. Oh wait, I've always done the latter. But it was glorious. And then, illness hit and hit hard. I had savings, but not enough. I mean, it's not like I have kids or something, right? And I have health insurance, so it's not like I needed to have shit tons of money sitting around in a savings account. Just enough to get by in case of an emergency, which I always assumed would only be the loss of a job. Yanno, as if I were immune to the leading cause of bankruptcy (it's medical expenses if you don't want to click on the link). Apparently, I'm not special. Not immune.
For three months, my salary was hacked and my expenses went through the roof. My primary care doctors are mind bogglingly incompetent, so I had to pay for the majority of my care out of pocket. I racked up a good chunk of debt in the process while eating through my savings. Fun times, y'all. Fun times.
There are new circumstances that will cause some money hiccups that I'll get into at a later time, but needless to say, I've had to get back on my game (and my blogging, because it's part of my getting-my-crap-in-line process) and, for the first time in eons, I am doing freelance work (in addition to volunteering. So much going on!) to bring in extra money to help beat the debt back down. Lots and lots of work ahead of me. Thankfully, I like what I do. Writing words on a glowing rectangle in an effort to help folks is a good gig. I'm lucky.
Most importantly? Now I know, via the most valuable kind of knowledge--first hand experience. I stopped ignoring my health issues, thinking they would vanish if abandoned. (Brilliant, right? I can't believe I haven't won the MacArthur genius grant yet!) I understand that emergencies come in all forms, not just job loss. Not having kids doesn't mean I don't need to be prepared for a multitude of potential catastrophes. But dammit, y'all, if I'm not pissed as hell about being back in credit card debt. Took me a year to get back into it and will likely take two years to get back out of it. Time to pick up my frugal living tools and knock that fucker out. Ready? Set. Here we go!
Where to begin? Lord Jesus. For those kind souls who have been reading this awhile, pardon the repeating info here. I began this blog eons ago in an attempt to share a tips on living frugally in a socially conscious manner and to keep myself on the path of a consciously frugal life. Talking about this crap helps me to stay immersed in it, lest I fall into the American Consumer sink hole of idiocy. Like most folks, I wander the path quite well most of the time and occasionally wander off course here and there, usually course correcting before anything catastrophic happens. Usually. I also deftly avoided monetizing and/or promoting the crap out of this thing. I don't want it to be commodified (is that a word?). I have other avenues to generate money. I have loved--absolutely loved--the process by which readership and community has grown. I've made friends from this sucker. Dammit, internet and blogging, I love you.
Over the past couple of years, I managed to get out of credit card debt (hollah!), kill my car and spend more than a year as a car-free person in Los Angeles (seriously dudes? Shit ain't easy), buy a new-to-me car, and get knocked down by some serious health issues. Thankfully, I am back on my feet post health drama, although it's still a work in progress and probably always will be. But around this time last year, I couldn't walk and couldn't work. Praise the Baby Jesus and all the fishies in the sea, I am now working away and working out regularly. Back on my feet in a most literal sense.
When I got out of debt and lived my car-free life, I thought I was set. Finally! All those years of learning the frugal trade and living the frugal life paid off! I could afford to do absolutely scandalous things like hire cleaning help, buy art, and drink excessively. Oh wait, I've always done the latter. But it was glorious. And then, illness hit and hit hard. I had savings, but not enough. I mean, it's not like I have kids or something, right? And I have health insurance, so it's not like I needed to have shit tons of money sitting around in a savings account. Just enough to get by in case of an emergency, which I always assumed would only be the loss of a job. Yanno, as if I were immune to the leading cause of bankruptcy (it's medical expenses if you don't want to click on the link). Apparently, I'm not special. Not immune.
For three months, my salary was hacked and my expenses went through the roof. My primary care doctors are mind bogglingly incompetent, so I had to pay for the majority of my care out of pocket. I racked up a good chunk of debt in the process while eating through my savings. Fun times, y'all. Fun times.
There are new circumstances that will cause some money hiccups that I'll get into at a later time, but needless to say, I've had to get back on my game (and my blogging, because it's part of my getting-my-crap-in-line process) and, for the first time in eons, I am doing freelance work (in addition to volunteering. So much going on!) to bring in extra money to help beat the debt back down. Lots and lots of work ahead of me. Thankfully, I like what I do. Writing words on a glowing rectangle in an effort to help folks is a good gig. I'm lucky.
Most importantly? Now I know, via the most valuable kind of knowledge--first hand experience. I stopped ignoring my health issues, thinking they would vanish if abandoned. (Brilliant, right? I can't believe I haven't won the MacArthur genius grant yet!) I understand that emergencies come in all forms, not just job loss. Not having kids doesn't mean I don't need to be prepared for a multitude of potential catastrophes. But dammit, y'all, if I'm not pissed as hell about being back in credit card debt. Took me a year to get back into it and will likely take two years to get back out of it. Time to pick up my frugal living tools and knock that fucker out. Ready? Set. Here we go!
Monday, December 24, 2012
Babies and Christmas
Merry Christmas, y'all! (One day early, natch.) Many years ago, I wrote a little diddy about what Christmas means to me. I would repeat myself, but making you suffer that once is enough. But I did want to revisit a point I made in that early post: Paternity can mean everything, and the story of Christ's birth asks us to let go of that crutch and embrace all life as holy.
Some friends of mine recently adopted a little boy. They met his wonderful, generous birth mother. His birth father is unknown to them. The story of his adoption is magical, much like the birth of Jesus. His birth mama was told to read through a series of pamphlets of prospective parents and pick three she thought would be suitable. She asked instead to have them read to her; she didn't want to see pictures of the wannabe moms and dads and have those images influence her. After having many families' stories shared with her, she grabbed one pamphlet and said, "This one." The adoption agency told her she needed to pick three folks, because the family might not be able to take the baby. The birth mother said no. It had to be these folks and these folks only. My friends received a call and were told there was a baby available and that they needed to respond within 30 minutes. The next thing they knew they were in the car, driving to pick up their newborn son.
Many folks go to extremes I cannot understand to have children that are biologically their own. To me, that is less about parenting and more about ownership. I do not pretend to understand their motivations. But the desire to be a parent, pregnancy or not? I get that. And this, my friends, is what a new mother looks like, regardless of whether or not she gave birth (meet my girl Marea and her baby boy, Sorin):
Their story is beautiful, and Sorin is one lucky little boy. His birth parents are Tongan and his adoptive mom and dad are short little white people. It's gonna be pretty hilarious watching this boy grow into a giant of a man next to his parents. He was adopted into a mind-bogglingly loving family and an incredibly supportive community. I suspect that is what his birth mother sensed, knowing that it had to be Marea and her husband who raised the beautiful boy she brought into the world. How lucky is this kid to have such a generous birth mother and such wonderful parents? What kind of world would we have if every child had such a story of love as his or her beginning?
The above photo shows Sorin and his beautiful mama on his second day in this big, bright world. Look at her eyes! Oh, her eyes. That photo will break my heart until the end of my days. Sorin is growing up healthy and strong, knocking the world over with his ridiculous cuteness. I mean, c'mon people! Look at this kid!
Adoption is a glorious thing. May the joy of this season fill your home and may the miracle of love forever surround you. Merry Christmas, folks!
Some friends of mine recently adopted a little boy. They met his wonderful, generous birth mother. His birth father is unknown to them. The story of his adoption is magical, much like the birth of Jesus. His birth mama was told to read through a series of pamphlets of prospective parents and pick three she thought would be suitable. She asked instead to have them read to her; she didn't want to see pictures of the wannabe moms and dads and have those images influence her. After having many families' stories shared with her, she grabbed one pamphlet and said, "This one." The adoption agency told her she needed to pick three folks, because the family might not be able to take the baby. The birth mother said no. It had to be these folks and these folks only. My friends received a call and were told there was a baby available and that they needed to respond within 30 minutes. The next thing they knew they were in the car, driving to pick up their newborn son.
Many folks go to extremes I cannot understand to have children that are biologically their own. To me, that is less about parenting and more about ownership. I do not pretend to understand their motivations. But the desire to be a parent, pregnancy or not? I get that. And this, my friends, is what a new mother looks like, regardless of whether or not she gave birth (meet my girl Marea and her baby boy, Sorin):
Their story is beautiful, and Sorin is one lucky little boy. His birth parents are Tongan and his adoptive mom and dad are short little white people. It's gonna be pretty hilarious watching this boy grow into a giant of a man next to his parents. He was adopted into a mind-bogglingly loving family and an incredibly supportive community. I suspect that is what his birth mother sensed, knowing that it had to be Marea and her husband who raised the beautiful boy she brought into the world. How lucky is this kid to have such a generous birth mother and such wonderful parents? What kind of world would we have if every child had such a story of love as his or her beginning?
The above photo shows Sorin and his beautiful mama on his second day in this big, bright world. Look at her eyes! Oh, her eyes. That photo will break my heart until the end of my days. Sorin is growing up healthy and strong, knocking the world over with his ridiculous cuteness. I mean, c'mon people! Look at this kid!
Adoption is a glorious thing. May the joy of this season fill your home and may the miracle of love forever surround you. Merry Christmas, folks!
Friday, December 14, 2012
Gift Giving of the Give Back Variety
Everyone's posting about this now, right? 'Tis the holidaze. Time to buy, buy, buy! Or make, make, make! Or simply fall to the ground and weep and pray that 2013 gets here sooner than later. Yanno, whatever gets you through the season.
I am gloriously inconsistent in my gift giving, which means that folks don't ever expect anything from me. If they do get something, fabulous! If not, well, that's just Al. Amiright? This year I am giving more to strangers (soldiers serving in 'Stan) than I am to folks in my daily life, because folks in my daily life aren't dealing with IEDs and absent families. My charitable giving occurs monthly, so I keep that love going year round. I'm a firm believer that Christmas really shouldn't be that terribly different than any other time of the year, save kicking up the giving a bit more. But, I'm a bleeding heart do-gooder who thinks hoarding wealth is pathological. Pardon me, I digress.
Wait, let me stop here for a minute and clarify something. I send letters and goodie boxes to soldiers serving abroad via Adopt a Platoon. But those are not "charity" cases. Military personnel are highly skilled professionals. They simply do their jobs in horrible conditions, so sending some goodies is a way of helping out champions, not of "giving to the less fortunate."
So, this year, in addition to homemade gifts, I am doing my best to support veteran owned business that contribute a portion of their proceeds to veterans charities. Two great vet owned businesses I've supported so far this season are Lock-N-Load Java and Rogue American Apparel. Both of the guys who run those shops are fabulous. Customer service is king, people! They were both able to make multiple shipments to my guys in the sandbox without any drama and included extras at no charge. (Lemme clarify this in case you're new here: I don't accept advertising and no one pays me to promote them. I just give a shout out to awesome peeps when I'm able.)
I've also added another non-profit organization to my monthly giving regime: Friends of TAFCOM. This lovely giving avenue was created by my friend Jamie Christiano, who has made a few trips to Tanzania to help out a community battered by HIV/AIDS. Since she began her involvement, the community has been able to build a school. A school! All from the help of one individual. That, my friends, is some powerful love in action. Learn more about her story here. In addition to outright donations, Jamie has set up a business called Maisha Designs, where women in Moshi, Tanzania make gorgeous purses and clutches and other fabulous delights. The proceeds return to the community to help them meet their needs.
Although I don't support the notion that we can shop our way to curing ills, I do believe that if you need a particular item (yeah, maybe even just want it too), why not purchase from independently owned businesses that support worthwhile causes? What organizations and businesses are you supporting this holiday season? How does your family handle gift giving during the holidaze? Do you have any veteran owned businesses you'd like to tell us about? Please share in the comments, iff'n ya feel so inclined. Happy holidays, y'all!
I am gloriously inconsistent in my gift giving, which means that folks don't ever expect anything from me. If they do get something, fabulous! If not, well, that's just Al. Amiright? This year I am giving more to strangers (soldiers serving in 'Stan) than I am to folks in my daily life, because folks in my daily life aren't dealing with IEDs and absent families. My charitable giving occurs monthly, so I keep that love going year round. I'm a firm believer that Christmas really shouldn't be that terribly different than any other time of the year, save kicking up the giving a bit more. But, I'm a bleeding heart do-gooder who thinks hoarding wealth is pathological. Pardon me, I digress.
Wait, let me stop here for a minute and clarify something. I send letters and goodie boxes to soldiers serving abroad via Adopt a Platoon. But those are not "charity" cases. Military personnel are highly skilled professionals. They simply do their jobs in horrible conditions, so sending some goodies is a way of helping out champions, not of "giving to the less fortunate."
So, this year, in addition to homemade gifts, I am doing my best to support veteran owned business that contribute a portion of their proceeds to veterans charities. Two great vet owned businesses I've supported so far this season are Lock-N-Load Java and Rogue American Apparel. Both of the guys who run those shops are fabulous. Customer service is king, people! They were both able to make multiple shipments to my guys in the sandbox without any drama and included extras at no charge. (Lemme clarify this in case you're new here: I don't accept advertising and no one pays me to promote them. I just give a shout out to awesome peeps when I'm able.)
I've also added another non-profit organization to my monthly giving regime: Friends of TAFCOM. This lovely giving avenue was created by my friend Jamie Christiano, who has made a few trips to Tanzania to help out a community battered by HIV/AIDS. Since she began her involvement, the community has been able to build a school. A school! All from the help of one individual. That, my friends, is some powerful love in action. Learn more about her story here. In addition to outright donations, Jamie has set up a business called Maisha Designs, where women in Moshi, Tanzania make gorgeous purses and clutches and other fabulous delights. The proceeds return to the community to help them meet their needs.
Although I don't support the notion that we can shop our way to curing ills, I do believe that if you need a particular item (yeah, maybe even just want it too), why not purchase from independently owned businesses that support worthwhile causes? What organizations and businesses are you supporting this holiday season? How does your family handle gift giving during the holidaze? Do you have any veteran owned businesses you'd like to tell us about? Please share in the comments, iff'n ya feel so inclined. Happy holidays, y'all!
Thursday, December 6, 2012
More Mail: Let's Send Love Letters!
Now that we've sent our lovely holiday cards to men and women serving in the military (see previous post), why don't we keep the mail train going? I know technology spares trees and makes everything in life glittery and shiny, but I still love an old school letter. I feel absolute glee over a handwritten note. Surely I'm not the only one?
My Life Coach (that's Californian for positivity focused therapist. Well, kinda. Basically, just awesome inspiration and concrete assistance in reaching goals), Jessica Colp, shared a lovely video on farcebook of a young woman named Hannah Brencher. Hannah was struggling with depression and decided to deal with it by leaving love letters to strangers tucked all over town. Coffee shops, subway stations, bookstores. She credits this small act with saving her sanity and bringing her joy. Check out her lovely 5 minute story:
Since I adore mail, I thought I should check this idea out and see if I could get involved. I did a search and found Hannah's site, MoreLoveLetters.com. I signed up for regular alerts and a 21 days of Christmas campaign, where each day we are given the story of someone who could use a love letter. Day 2 was a mother dealing with the loss of her daughter who had passed away the previous year. Hello, perspective. The site also encourages folks to leave random love letters around town and provides a few examples of what to write.
Why do I keep blabbing about mail? Well, other than being a massive nerd, I know how difficult things can be for many folks around this time of the year. Rates of suicide go up. People bury themselves in debt trying to please others and recreate the images of excess shoved down our throats. This time of the year is supposed to be about gratitude, generosity, Jesus (for the religiously inclined), and all things good and golden. But for too many folks, it's a horribly depressing time where every fear and heartache becomes amplified. So, I cling to small things that bring joy. And I'm pretty convinced that the best way to feel love is to give it, and that whatever we feed grows. What better way feel love than through writing a love letter? What better gift to humanity than to send those letters out into the world to complete strangers?
Whether or not you choose to join me on the mail bandwagon, I do hope you'll choose to spread a little love in simple, non-materialistic ways this month. The gifts are great and lawd knows I love 'em, but it's only part of the picture.
Here's my love letter to you, dear reader: Thank you for taking the time out of your busy life to sit here and read my inane blathering. If you ventured here, where I chatter about living frugally, social justice and all manner of bleeding heart do-gooder, you're more than likely the kind of person who respects resources and wants to use them wisely. I suspect you are generous, loving and a champion of those who have no voice. I bet you are an amazing friend. I think the world is a much better place because you're in it. Thank you for sharing yourself here, even if you never comment or we never have a conversation. We are all so lucky to have you in the world. I hope each and every day, you feel loved and appreciated. I hope all your best dreams come true. I want you to be happy, healthy and deliriously in love with your life. May all that is golden and good in this beautiful world be yours. You deserve it. You are a blessing. You are loved.
My Life Coach (that's Californian for positivity focused therapist. Well, kinda. Basically, just awesome inspiration and concrete assistance in reaching goals), Jessica Colp, shared a lovely video on farcebook of a young woman named Hannah Brencher. Hannah was struggling with depression and decided to deal with it by leaving love letters to strangers tucked all over town. Coffee shops, subway stations, bookstores. She credits this small act with saving her sanity and bringing her joy. Check out her lovely 5 minute story:
Since I adore mail, I thought I should check this idea out and see if I could get involved. I did a search and found Hannah's site, MoreLoveLetters.com. I signed up for regular alerts and a 21 days of Christmas campaign, where each day we are given the story of someone who could use a love letter. Day 2 was a mother dealing with the loss of her daughter who had passed away the previous year. Hello, perspective. The site also encourages folks to leave random love letters around town and provides a few examples of what to write.
Why do I keep blabbing about mail? Well, other than being a massive nerd, I know how difficult things can be for many folks around this time of the year. Rates of suicide go up. People bury themselves in debt trying to please others and recreate the images of excess shoved down our throats. This time of the year is supposed to be about gratitude, generosity, Jesus (for the religiously inclined), and all things good and golden. But for too many folks, it's a horribly depressing time where every fear and heartache becomes amplified. So, I cling to small things that bring joy. And I'm pretty convinced that the best way to feel love is to give it, and that whatever we feed grows. What better way feel love than through writing a love letter? What better gift to humanity than to send those letters out into the world to complete strangers?
Whether or not you choose to join me on the mail bandwagon, I do hope you'll choose to spread a little love in simple, non-materialistic ways this month. The gifts are great and lawd knows I love 'em, but it's only part of the picture.
Here's my love letter to you, dear reader: Thank you for taking the time out of your busy life to sit here and read my inane blathering. If you ventured here, where I chatter about living frugally, social justice and all manner of bleeding heart do-gooder, you're more than likely the kind of person who respects resources and wants to use them wisely. I suspect you are generous, loving and a champion of those who have no voice. I bet you are an amazing friend. I think the world is a much better place because you're in it. Thank you for sharing yourself here, even if you never comment or we never have a conversation. We are all so lucky to have you in the world. I hope each and every day, you feel loved and appreciated. I hope all your best dreams come true. I want you to be happy, healthy and deliriously in love with your life. May all that is golden and good in this beautiful world be yours. You deserve it. You are a blessing. You are loved.
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